Saturday, July 16, 2011

The No Judgement Zone

Everyone has seen it happen.

You are walking through the office and you overhear two co workers trashing another co worker in a corner. Never over anything relevant like the quality of her work, or that he set your desk on fire.  They are always commenting on things they personally don't like about the other person.

Now in this situation you can do one of three things:
     1.  You can jump right in on the conversation
          and begin to criticize the person right along
          with the others.
     2.  You can walk away in semi disbelief and
          pretend that you didn't hear anything,even
          though the entire drive home you will
          will be thinking about all of the things you
          would have said to show those people they
          were wrong and out of line, had you not been
          on your way to get the celery out of your
          teeth at the time.
     3.  OR  you could actually say something.

Now honestly, most of us are going to end up doing the second.  There are reasons for this.  Some of us may be shy, maybe it was your boss or a senior employee doing the trashing, or maybe you just can't think of the right thing to say in those situations and you thought it best to not give the offenders ammo for you.  But, whatever the reason, let's look at why the third is the right thing to do.

I was once told that "Every person is doing the best that they think they can do with what they've got."

What I mean, is that everyone is born with some things, good looks, family connections, etc.
Then everyone is taught other things, and all of those things are different for every person.
Together, what you are born with and what you are taught make up what you have "got". Are you following ?

So if the ditsy girl at the office asks you more questions than most people would to ensure that the job she is helping you to do is done correctly, do you really need to talk about her behind her back for it?  After all, the job is getting done, you don't have to do it yourself, and she is polite and efficient. 

You should always try to remember that everyone is different.  Things may annoy you about people in your life, but instead of talking about them behind their backs, try thinking about all of the things you do that annoy others. And always try to find something good in everyone you meet.  Big or small there is always something there.  No one is perfect.  And after all, can you imagine if you were the person being trashed in the halls?

Next time you hear that conversation, say something.  Defend the victim of idol bitching.  You may not win friends, but you will gain respect.  Even the gossipers know they are in the wrong, otherwise they wouldn't be whispering and they would not be ashamed to say it to their victim in front of the entire office.

To the BITCHERs  :  Say it loud and say it proud, or keep it to yourself.  (Should I add a flashing sign?)  Your negativity is probably doing far more damage to the work environment than anything the person you think you are better than could do.

1 comment:

  1. "Poor minds talk about people, average minds talk about events, great minds talk about ideas."

    -Eleanor Roosevelt